If you recently discovered your partner is a serial cheater, you may be dealing with many complicated emotions ranging from shock to sadness to resentment and self-loathing. You may have lost your trust in your partner and may find it challenging to understand and accept things.
The situation is more complicated if the serial cheater is your legally married spouse. Though it may seem extremely painful initially, identifying serial cheaters signs is the first step to exiting a bad relationship.
Confront the Cheater
Confrontation is not merely to call the cheater out. It is an essential source of closure. Let the cheater know you have a solid reason to believe he/she is cheating. Back up your allegation with facts.
The serial cheater will most likely refuse to accept blame in the beginning or get defensive. If you think the person can be abusive, you may want to confront him/her in a setting where your safety is assured.
Give Yourself Time
Healing from a toxic relationship is a long-drawn process. If your partner was displaying serial cheaters signs, chances are you have been subject to a lot of manipulation, blame, and sadness. You might even need therapy or the help of a support group to recover. Understanding that recovery takes time is essential.
Understand It’s Not Your Fault
Infidelity is an act of selfishness. It is usual for you to blame yourself for what happened. However, it’s essential to know that what happened is not your fault. Manipulators use tactics to guilt-trip you. Cheating is probably a consequence of your partner’s insecurity.
Consider Legal Implications
If you are married to a serial cheater, you may want to understand your rights as a victim of adultery. Whether you want to take legal action against your spouse or not is a personal choice. However, psychology experts recommend it’s best to have evidence ready even if legal proceedings are not part of the plan right now.
Therapy and Support Groups
Depending on the intensity of the emotional trauma and pain you are going through, you may want to consider professional therapy and counseling. If you have any reason to think that the grieving process is affecting your daily functioning, then putting off therapy might be a huge mistake.
If you have children or other dependents, therapy becomes even more critical. Joining a support group will help you connect with people who have relatable experiences. Support groups will help you know that you are not alone.
It is impractical to believe a serial cheater will change. However, a lot of victims may want to give the relationship an additional chance. Couples therapy can be an excellent option when both people are willing to work on the relationship and themselves.
Therapy may help you and your partner untangle deep-seated issues. It may also help the cheater identify his/her unaddressed issues and work on them.
Don’t Resort to Quick Fixes
Accepting that your partner cheated on you can build a sense of uncertainty and emotional turbulence. You may feel the urge to take revenge or fix the relationship to make it seem like things are back to normal.
Rebound relationships may also seem attractive. However, these steps may prolong your grief and the healing journey. Choosing to stay focused and patient will help you recover faster.
Lean on Your Friends and Family
While it may be difficult, opening up to your loved ones and allowing them to support you emotionally might bring you a lot of peace. Staying connected with your friends and family will also help you remember that there are people who love you and care for you.
Engaging in conversations and activities with them may turn out to be a welcome distraction from the problems.